Two condoms walk into a gay bar. The people in the bar are perplexed that two inanimate objects are capable of locomotion.

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Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

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Why did the Hispanic woman cheat on her husband? Because he couldn't maintain an erection, was boring, and collected stamps.

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My uncle was involved in 9/11... He called me before the plane crashed into the twin towers, his final words were so comforting... "ALLAH AKBAR!!!"

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Barny the purple dinosaur has no imagination, stuck his finger up his ass and called it masterbaition!

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What did the homeless man get for his birthday? AIDS

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LeBron James proposes. So what does he put on the girls finger? Ben L.

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Why did you chicken cross the road? C u n t.

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What do you call a bear in an elevator?...A fire hazard.

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Why did the guy in the wheelchair die? He was mauled by tigers.

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women's rights

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Whats the saddest part about the sandy hook shooting? There were still bullets in the clip... Im going to hell by the way.

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Who's Micheal Jackson?

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Vote this up

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What do u call a gay dinosaur? Dinosaurs don't exist

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A bartender walks into a bar. He serves alcohol for a living.

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What do you call a red light A:soon to be green

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Q. What do you call a bashed black man laying on pavement? A. Neapolitan

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What did the crazy asian man say just before he died? He didn't say anything- he was in an 18 month long coma due to a brain stem stroke. He left behind a wife, a 3 year old daughter and a newborn son.

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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A jewish boy walks past a quarter on the ground..

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How did the mexican cross the border? He went through border patroll, and then later became a legal citizen of North America

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What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops