Two men were walking down the road when one of them spotted an old lamp lying in a ditch. After examining the lamp's handiwork for several seconds one man rubbed the lamp with his shirt sleeve. The men then continued down the road.

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Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

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Why did the man throw a clock? In retaliation for his wife having thrown a vase at him. The couple has a history of domestic violence. More than one friend has suggested counselling.

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Where do you find a dog with no legs ? Same place you left it ...

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He did it for fitness.

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How do you confuse a blonde? put her in a circular room and tell her to stand in the corner

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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One day a mexican guy came up with a great anti-joke about jewish guys. Upon sharing it with a canadian buddy of his, he collapsed and died from a cerebral hemorrhage where he was then hit by a bus and mauled to bits by a pack of saber-tooth tigers.

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What do you get if you mix rice with slightly different flavoured rice? Rice.

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There are two types of people in this world, those that can't count

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When you wish upon a star... You are only seeing the light of that star, which has taken billions of years to travel here. The star that you are looking at has most likely dead, Just like your dreams.

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

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my grandpa told me "dont let fear rule your life" 2 hours later he got hit by a train.

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Two latino men are drinking at a bar. Suddenly, one man falls off his barstool, unconscious. Later that day, he was diagnosed with pancreatitis, and died never having dealt with his severe alcoholism.

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What do you get when you stab a six year old with a pair of scissors and a machete? A very angry, potentially murderous mother out for revenge.

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one man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. when he was drinking the beer he choked and died

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How do you kill a blind man, run over him in slow motion

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Just got back from the corner store. Bought 3 corners.

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Ha ha. You've wasted your life, sucker!

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What would you do for a Klondike bar? Pay a reasonable sum of money.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Llega San Pedro le dice a dios y se va.

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Your mommas so stupid she put a quarter into a parking meter and waited for a gumball to drop out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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