why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

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I'm Stephen Hawking, and I'm a PC.

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What you do if you poo out a slug? Eat it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer murdered his family

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nock nock who's there is me u idiot we aranged this yesterday

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Yo momma's so fat that her weight is completely disproportional to the average weight of someone her age.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

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Remember that part where Jesus gets angry at a fig three and kills it because it "was lazy" for refusing to grow figs at winter? Brother Jeez, that was kinda mean man! You know it was winter rite? Anti Joke or not, that part is funny, so if Jesus returns and wants you to make him a sammich you better go get that goddamn sammich!

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Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

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What did the Liver say to the Heart? Nothing, Organs can't talk

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad your whole family isn't dead from a fatal car accident?

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What do you call a cow painted in red a cat ( PS : i lied about the cow + the paint ! )

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Why do fat people commit suicide

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Q : What is the similarity between me and my friend? A : We both are crazy

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what's the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? dolphins aren't ghosts!!

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What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

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Knock, knock who's there? Steve Evans. Steve Evans who? You've already forgotten me? We just met on Eharmony yesterday.

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Roses r red, Violets r blue, u think id eva cry ova u?? I told u i luvd u, n u believed it true... Well guess wat baby? U got played 2 B)

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*Dubstep* CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW BWAB BWAB

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When the poop hits the fan and you walk in with your pants around your ankles, it's a bad sign!

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How much do polar bears weigh? Between 800 and 1600 pounds

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Why did the teenager turn in his work on time? He chose not to procrastinate.

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What's the difference between a volleyball and a tree? They're both volleyballs except for the tree.

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A Mexican man, an American man, and an Italian man go to a bridge. The mexican said "we have too much of this in our country!" and throws pasta into the water. The Mexican man says "we have to much of this in out country!" and throws a taco into the water. The American throws in the Mexican man and says "we have to much of these in our country!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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