What did the biscuit say when he saw his friend get run over? Oh my god. Dave, are you ok? Somebody call an ambulance.

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Q. Why is me question not funny? A. Because there is no point to it.

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What's long, yellow, and can kill you if swallowed? A school bus

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why didn't the Asian ask for a calculator cause he was doing the dishes and a calculator seemed inappropriate

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

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Two men walk into a bar and begin ordering drinks. Both men engage in polite conversation with each other. At the end of the night they each take taxi's home because they realize the potential risk they pose to others if they drive intoxicated.

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mommy mommy! why are we pushing the car over the cliff?! the mom answers shhh youll wake your father...

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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why did Sarah fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? not sarah

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sarah!

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A priest, a Muslim and a Rabbi sit next to each other on a plane they say nothing to each other during the flight and reach their destinations safely.

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What's worse than finding a worm on your apple? Trench foot on your eyebrow.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Well, there's one way...

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a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

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What's blue, orange, and silver all over? Nothing. That's a ridiculous combination of colors.

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Barack Obama

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Feminism

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What do you call a cow who can't produce milk? Utter failure.

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What do you get when you shoot 3 cute kittens that have just walked into the house? 3 dead kittens

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why dont black people celebrate thanksgiving? kfc is closed on holidays

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lucas sehnoun told me anti-joke was funny

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Why did little Suzan fall of the swing? She has no arms. Knock,Knock Who's there? Not Suzan

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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