Whats worse than getting a paper-cut? Getting shot. In the head. Three times.

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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Why did the Muslim man burn the American flag? The flag had touched the ground, which, by tradition, means it has to be disposed. And the proper way of disposing it is by burning.

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The scientists of Cambridge have finally developed a cure for feeling low! They have presented it in the style of a song. See if you can spot the hidden frequency wavelengths when you sing it out lout. They are what make you feel better. You've got to LOVE the world! Be a friend! And when You're down you've got to get up again! And when your blue, here's what you do. Just sing this happy tune! However if that fails, then you should consider getting professional help.

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A murderer walks into a bar with a knife. He then stabs seven people and is then arrested shortly after.

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two mexicans are in a car, who's driving one of the mexicans!!!

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Why did the little girl lose her necklace? Because she got her head blown off

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What do you get when you cross a parrot and a beach ball? A beach ball with a parrot design on it.

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Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, but the very next day, your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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Neither have I

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How hot was the blonde considering she was in Africa for the first time and it was 103 degrees, very

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so a jewish man walks into a bar. He looks at the bartender and says...this better be free

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Your mum's so fat that she's incredibly lucky she has a loving and supportive husband who values her personality over her appearance.

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Why didnt Stevie Wonder wave back at the white man? Because he's a racist.

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a Polar bear in an Igloo.

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Really? Okay! UPPER COMMENT GOOD NIGHT NEROCHAN!

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what is red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket Waht is blue and looks like a bucket? (99% of the time they will say "a blue bucket") No, a red bucket in disguise!

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Why did Sarah limp to school? Because she got hit by a tree

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what do you call a black man that killed somebody? a murderer.

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5 Christians, 4 Arabs, 3 Jews, and a Monkey are locked in a room with sticky bombs, hand grenades, a bible, and some bananas. What do they do? play scrabble

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What's worse than an earthquake? Two earthquakes. What's worse than two earthquakes? Three earthquakes. What's worse than three earthquakes? The world exploding.

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Why is there no gambling in Africa? Because there's no money in Africa.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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