Why did Johnny fall of the Swing?? Because i hit him with a shovel

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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Wanna hear a funny story? Sure. Ok,

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What did The Black man have for breakfast? Bran Flakes.

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A Horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks the horse, "Why the long face?". The horse didn't understand English, so he took a shit on the floor, and left.

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Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He calls the right number.

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How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the ground

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how do you make an idiot laugh? tell him a joke from antijoke

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once you go Persian, there is no other alternative

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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What do you call it when a cigarette is brown instead of white? A cigarette that is or has been damp so that the nicotine was able to bleed into the paper and dye it.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was strapped to the first monkey.

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why did the girl fall off the swing? because someone threw a fridge at her.

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What the last thing that went through Osama's mind? A bullet

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Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

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Why was the kid dizzy? He ran in a circle repeatedly.

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What's worse than being named SAID? Having AIDS.. And getting a bee sting - it hurts like ****!

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Whats better than seeing a worm in your apple... Reading the the next anti-joke.

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Why couldn't Gladice get out of bed? Because she was dead!

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if life gives you lemons. squeeze one into your moms eye.

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Did you hear phonsi was Gay? I just found out too, he walked into the diner and said, "ive got AAIIIIIDS."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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