Why couldn't the mute kid tell his mom the house was on fire? Casue he fell down the stairs and broke his hands...

roses are red violets are blue me n' friends guna rape you trolololoLOLOLOlololOLLOLOLOLOLLLOLOLOLOLO01010101010111 666

Q: Why is it funny to laugh at gay men? A: They like men.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the house. knock knock. who's there? the chicken!

What did the white man say to the black man that sneezed? -Bless you.

what Did The Cow Say To The Chicken, Moo

Q. What goes 100 mph and is green? A. A frog in a blender

In Soviet Russia, everything you do will have an equal and opposite effect, for the laws of physics still apply in every part of the world. No matter where you are.

Your mama is so fat but she is also a very kind and friendly person so her weight doesn't bother me at all,

Your mom is so old, she was able to have children around the time you were born.

Did you hear about the Irish man that accidently killed himself,he farted in the bath & drowned trying to smell it

A man said to a performer performin in a concert,"Go break a leg!". The performer did not respond because he is perfoming.

How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

WHo owns a white van? JOSH!!

It's all Taggart

A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

What did the blind and deaf kid get for Christmas? Cancer.

Why are Asians good at Math? Because they are bad at English.

What do you call a 3 legged dog on a red unicycle? An unlikely set of circumstances.

Why did the horse escape from his stable? He didn't. He stayed there all night and his owner took him out the next day as the weather was beautiful.

What did the black man say to the jew and the blonde girl as they walked to the car. Shotgun.

Why shouldn't I go out today? Well I haven't done any work today. Actually no. It's not that. I'd have to ask my guardian Sally to bring out the wheelchair, and well, I'm afraid of her. She beats me. My hobbies are playing football, watching Loose Women and looking at pictures of Gary Barlow on Google Images.

Guy: do u wanna hear a joke about my dick? Nah its to long Girl: Do u wanna hear a joke about my vagina? Actually that would make me very self concious I have ghonorrea and would appreciate not having to tell one.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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