Knock Knock. Who's there? [no one] After that day, Dave moves out of the house assuming that a ghost knocked on his door.

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An asian man, a black man, and a white man walk into a bar. All three of them order a scotch, coincidentally this is their favorite beverage.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a speeding moped.

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In Soviet Russia, the same thing that happens here, happens there.

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whats the difrence between a japaneese and chineese person? one is from japan and one is from china.

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Why do dead Republicans float? Their corpse's mass-to-volume ratio is less than the water they displace. It is very sad.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

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Why did the girl trip in the middle of the street? She tripped over the kid who dropped his ice cream because he got hit by a bus.

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What does Chuck Norris order at a coffee shop? Coffee.

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my goldfish never writes me back when i send him letters

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Q:What did Sandy say to Spongebob? A:Nothing, They were both crushed by the water pressure of being on the bottom of the ocean.

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?"i'm so turned on right now." - horny light bulb

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If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

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how do u wake kesha up? Answer:set her alarm clock to a reasonable time

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet up with his friend that was on the other side.

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Roses are red The grass is green I want you in my bed If you know what I mean.

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What do you call a gay man having sex with a woman? Sex.

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What did john say to dave when his grandfather died ?

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What do you call a Jew in the oven? The oven repair man

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Why couldn't the blonde have children? She had pelvic inflammatory disease.

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do you have snow in your vagina? because i am going to plow you

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What's better than Sookie? The holocaust

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What did the man do with his cat? he threw it in the garbage because he didn't like it

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Roses are red Violets are blue You are green Curse you!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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