Why did the blonde get fired from the m&m factory? She made skittles.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

why was 7 afraid of 6?that is impossible it is older than six and stronger than its mother

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What do you call a gay man? Homosexual

thumb_up thumb_down +36

why did the chicken cross the road? to form the basis of an extremly popular jokewhich would grace the schoolyards around the world for centurys to come!

thumb_up thumb_down +36

A old man walks into a hospital He doesn't come back out

thumb_up thumb_down +36

A. What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew: B. Pizza's don't scream when you put them into a oven.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Two clarinets were locked in a case for 20 years. They both play well.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Hey I just banged you, and it was crazy, delete my number, and keep the baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

thumb_up thumb_down +36

If you were expecting an antijoke you have come to the wrong place however here is a good recipe for a cake: Ingredients 2-1/2 cups 2% milk 1 cup butter, cubed 8 ounces semisweet chocolate, chopped 3 eggs 2 teaspoons vanilla extract 2-2/3 cups all-purpose flour 2 cups sugar 1 teaspoon baking soda 1/2 teaspoon salt FILLING: 6 tablespoons butter, cubed 4 ounces bittersweet chocolate, chopped 2-1/2 cups confectioners' sugar 1/2 cup heavy whipping cream GANACHE: 10 ounces semisweet chocolate, chopped 2/3 cup heavy whipping cream Directions In a large saucepan, cook the milk, butter and chocolate over low heat until melted. Remove from the heat; let stand for 10 minutes. Preheat oven to 325°. In a large bowl, beat eggs and vanilla; stir in chocolate mixture until smooth. Combine the flour, sugar, baking soda and salt; gradually add to chocolate mixture and mix well (batter will be thin). Transfer to three greased and floured 9-in. round baking pans. Bake 25-30 minutes or until a toothpick inserted in center comes out clean. Cool 10 minutes before removing from pans to wire racks to cool completely. For filling, in a small saucepan, melt butter and chocolate. Stir in confectioners' sugar and cream until smooth. For ganache, place chocolate in a small bowl. In a small saucepan, bring cream just to a boil. Pour over chocolate; whisk until smooth. Cool, stirring occasionally, until ganache reaches a spreading consistency. Place one cake layer on a serving plate; spread with half of the filling. Repeat layers. Top with remaining cake layer. Spread ganache over top and sides of cake. Store in the refrigerator. Yield: 16 servings.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

roses are red violets r blue jump off a building no one likes u

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What did Sam Houston Say to Jim Bowie when he say all the Mexicans coming Towards the Alamo? That's a lot of Mexicans.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A shark walks into a bar. The bartender asks someone to call animal control to remove the nearly-dead sea creature from his bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did John get hard? He froze to death

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What can be said about a high school drop out who is 30, lives with his mom, and plays WoW all day? He is probably a very high level mage

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A muslim walks out of a plane.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What does a horse and a donkey have in common? They are both very different from trees

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did Bert go to the doctor? He had an appointment.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A black man, a jewish man and a white man walk into a bar. The black man shoots the bartender, the white man takes the money and the jewish man holds the customers hostage.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in every apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops