what is red, white, and spins around real fast? a baby in a washing machine

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Q.Whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A. I don't were my cleats on my trampoline.

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I don't always drink beer but when I do, I viciously beat my wife and children.

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A man walks into a bar falls into the street and gets run over. It was very tragic

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I hate Mondays, the man said as he drove to work. Fortunately for him, it was a Wednesday.

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how many drunk drivers does it take to drive home one and only one, if more than one drunk driver tried to drive home at the same time in the same car they would surely crash and not make it home.

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Your mother is so fat, she appeals to my secret fetish.

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What's more funny than an anti-joke? A joke.

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Why did Sally fall off the Empore State Building? Her mother threw a refrigerator at her. -BG

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Making fun of Charlie Sheen is like shooting up in a barrel.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A kind hearted serial killer who will win your heart emotionally and then shoot you to death unexpectedly.

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What did you the blonde death amuptee child get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What did the child get from there parent on Christmas? Nothing. He's an orphan.

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Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if you father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

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A man gets three wishes from a talking banana. His first wish is for a gay lover, his second wish is to have a naked grizzly bear, and his third is to become a professional tennis player. Soon after he got Aids from the Grizzly bear.

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How about that airline food?

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why did the baby die ? he fell down the stairs

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do you know what was a good idea? not last night

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What is the name of Helin Keller's street, state and pet Street: Mahhehb State: Hahgre Pet: habdsa

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A man jumps of the roof of his building. The superindentant now owns the building and the man who jumped off the building has 59 fractures. Oh and he died.

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Why'd the dead man cross the road? He didn't, he was dead, therefore incapable of doing anything at all.

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A guy walks into a bar and says "ouch!" The bartender says "are you okay?" "Yeah I just stubbed my toe" Then the guy walks it off, and then orders a drink.

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have Somthing To tell you F*** You

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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