Why did Shakespeare die? It's called life.

Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are white Dandelions are yellow

yo mama so stupid i'm fairly certain she has a learning disability.

Why was the black man picking cotton? Because he was in an area where slavery is a socially and morally accepted practice.

Red my dear, we are no exceptions.

An older man and a young boy are holding hands and walking into the woods together. The boy looks up and say, "gee, I'm scared, it's dark in there." the old man answers, "Yeah, just think how I feel....I have to walk out of here alone!"

How do you identify a Chinese tank? They smash their own people.

W. If I was one thing other then a person why would I be? M. The sun. W. Aww, so I brighten your day? M. No, you're just hard to look at.

What's worse than being forced to drink your own urine and eat a disabled kids poop? James Holmes (Ironic that the text I had to type in to post this was "I'M BATMAN".)

SQUID DOMINATION!!! Squids WILL Take Over the World!!!

Your mom is so fat because she eats too much and is most likely incapable of controlling when to stop.

What did the bank teller say after the man asked for a pen? Would you prefer black or blue?

what's yellow and hovers? a yellow hovercraft.

What happens if you punch a girl? An equal rights protest.

What do you call a dead blond in a coset? Last years hide and seek winner.

So three Irish guys walk out of a bar

why weren't all the jews wiped out in WW2 the gas bill was too expensive

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? eating the worm causing it to breed inside of your body later causing them to eat you internally

How much weight can an ant carry up a mole hill? Ice cream has no bones.

whats awesome? a blade of grass with a mexican hat and a revolver.

I put my baby in a microwave.

A dog walks into a forest and sees a whale. The dog asks "aren't you supposed to be in the ocean?" The whale replies, "yes."

What do you get when you cross the ocean with a dinosaur? Wet.

Q:what's worse than eating outdated raviolis? A:terminal cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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