- Anti Joke

How do you get a baby to start crying? Drop a brick on it. How do you get it to stop crying? Drop two bricks on it.

Whats red and looks like a bucket? -a red bucket Whats blue and looks like a bucket? -a red bucket disguised as a blue bucket

Why didn't the politically-correct lawyer laugh at his black neighbour's jokes? He had an incapacitating malady of oralfacialoaralysis rendering him unable to laugh or smile

Why did the seagull fly over the sea, It had wings.

Why did the 3 legged dog fall over? Because it was knocked over by a passing pedestrian.

Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

What happened to the man who went to a strip bar? What happens to all of us. He died.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

2 blondes were heading to Disney world, they saw up ahead that said "Disney World left" then took a left and enjoyed Disney World and had fun on the rides

What happened to the boy that got hit by a bus? He was by a 2nd bus, by which he felt no pain because the first bus crushed his lungs and skull causing suffocation and profuse hemorraging.

Why was the chubby bird that you were staring at you angry. Because you were looking at him.

What is 9+10? 19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

How do you get a baby to start crying? Drop a brick on it. How do you get it to stop crying? Drop two bricks on it.

A Scotsman, an Irishman and an Englishman walk into a bar... They enjoy their drinks and leave.

it's easy to take part, just type your text below!

A horse walks in to a bar. The bartender calls animal control.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

Why did the squirrel across the river upside down? So it could keep its nuts dry.

mary poppins' handbag is full of dick

Q:Whats yellow and on the floor in the bathroom? A: A Rubber Ducky

womans having rights.

What's better then finding an apple in the Holocaust? Finding a tunnel under the fence.

No because your face is really f***** up.

What do you call a cow who can't produce milk? Utter failure.