what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was dead. Why'd the other monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was stapled to the dead monkey!

What is white and flys at you from a tree? A refridgarator. I lied about the flying part.

Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

Why did the man throw a clock? In retaliation for his wife having thrown a vase at him. The couple has a history of domestic violence. More than one friend has suggested counselling.

What do you call a man floating in a pool with his arms chopped off? A murder victim.

Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Boo Radley.

What's the worst subject in school? None of them. You need school to get by in life. Get over it.

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a serial killer.

My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

A Black guy and a Jewish guy walk into a bar. What does the black guy say to the Jew? "Hi".

Whats bigger than 'burger king'? A. burger

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree Because it died

There was a mexican man and a chinese man, They walked into a bomb shop and bought three bombs, then left.

What do you call a chicken that can't lay eggs? a rooster

Roses are red Violets are blue I need a job Stop spitting on me

Q. Pete and Repeat were sitting on a wall. Repeat fell off. Which one was left? A. Pete. Yep.

How do you make a dog drink? Put one in a blender.

-Bumper Sticker- Honk if you love Jesus. (Text while driving if you want to meet him)

Why did the courageous young boy always follow his dreams? His IQ sucked.

Q: How Do you make a baby be quiet? A: slowly chop it's head off with a blunted axe once it's head is off eat it

What did the man say when he found out he had cancer? Nothing. He was so in shock, that he later died from another type of cancer.

why did the baby fall down the stairs? i pushed it.

What do you call a prostitute with morals? Ironic.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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