What do you call a deer with no eyes? A vet.

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Why does the girl get humped by a pig? Because she has sexual needs and no other more attractive animal, including an human wants to hump her.

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A man walks into a bar an orders a few pints. He then goes home and brutally rapes his wife and chains his staring kids to a fencepost in the backyard along with their deceased dog named Spot.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Chuck Norris." "Chuck Norris who?" "NOBODY SAYS 'CHUCK NORRIS WHO'!!!"

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Hey Bill, did you know we have a black guy in our family tree? Really? Yeah, he's still hanging there

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What is worse than being bitten by a snake? Being bitten twice! - Louis

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If Chuck Norris was really so awesome he would come and slam my head into the keyboard.

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What did the anti-social man say to a girl Nothing

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Yo mama's so skinny, she should probably go in for eating disorders' counseling.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being chased by a serial rapist.

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Hey Jew. What? Shut up.

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you are as stupid as alec. lol neewb

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How many are in a baker's dozen? 12 bakers

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Q: How much dirt is in a hole 3 by 6 by 2 feet? A: There's no dirt, it's a hole.

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Roses are red bullets are led if you don't take me back now i'll shoot you in the head!

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Me: Hey Chris! Chris: WTF.u.c.k

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Where did Susie go during the bombings? Susie was wandering around the streets as she felt like she didn't know where she was any more. Everything was burnt to ashes. She came across a man who she has never met. He tells her to follow him. She did.Later, Susie, the mysterious man and a few other people with him were in a private meeting room. The mysterious man tells Susie that he was a Frenchman and he was with the resistance. A few minutes later, the bombs were dropping everywhere. The meeting room was destroyed and Susie, the Frenchman and his men were under attack. The French resistance were about to fight, but retreated - for they were French. Susie was left, lying there as she saw a bomb in the sky about to land on her. She tried to get up and run, but the bomb was too fast. It got her. So yeah. Susie went everywhere, like you lot said.

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why did the black man leave his home because there was a hurricane that would have killed him if he stayed.

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Why did the man jump into the river? He wanted to go for a swim, but the pool was closed, so he swam in the river.

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Did you know that Hellen Keller had a roller coaster in her backyard? Neither did she

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“Before I know it, he’s got both of my hands in his viselike grip above my head, and he’s pinning me to the wall using his lips … His other hand grabs my hair and yanks down, bringing my face up, and his lips are on mine … My tongue tentatively strokes his and joins his in a slow, erotic dance … His erection is against my belly.”

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What's the difference between michael jackson and casey anthony? Michael jackson's dead.

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Two Cows are knitting soda water in a lightbulb. One of them said: Talking about milk, what time is it? The other pulls out a thermometer, looked at it and said: Wednesday.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Thats a matter of opinion

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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