A man attempts to rob a bank. The police are called and the robber is arrested for attempted robbery.

How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

Why do seagulls live by the sea? Because they wouldn't be able to live anywhere else.

Hey can you turn Tmartn upI can't hear him

When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

Two muffins are cooling on a windowsill. One muffin says to the other "It sure is a beautiful day today." The other muffin says "Holy shit! A talking muffin!"

How do you make an onion cry? Kill the chef.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry Show me your tits

Yo mamas so fat she hates her life and the example she sets for her children.

Write your own pointless joke on http://pointless-jokes.tk

What did the asian kid do before he got a blood test? He studied.

dat shoe shine tho

why do german shower have eleven holes? jews have 10 fingers

Once upon a time, there were two brothers jumping on a bed. The one stopped because the other fell off the bead and died.

Knock Knock. Who's there? [no one] After that day, Dave moves out of the house assuming that a ghost knocked on his door.

Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. "Where's my tractor?"

What do you call 10 dead babies in a blender? A horrible, horrible child abuse incident.

Brother : you see this hand Sister : yes Brother : if you dont leave ill slap you with it Sister : no you wont !SLAP!!!!

Why did the man fart? He didn't. Stop being so dirty-minded.

Girl: That's pretty big. Boy: That's what she said. Woman: Yes, I enjoys large genitals.

What was the women doing out of the kitchen? Watching the movie 'Birth of a Nation' at her father's house

Your mother is so fat, that somebody should inform her of the risks of eating unhealthy foods because she could obtain life threatening diseases.

Why doesn't the farmer have a dog? He doesn't like dogs.

One day i woke up, and found my wife dead on the floor. lol.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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