Knock Knock, Who's There? Not Ann Frank because she died in the Holocaust along with 6 million other innocent people.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a light bulb??? I don't know don't ask me when I'm asking you the question!!!

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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How do you help someone stop drowning You take your foot off the back their head.

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Why was the boy sad? Because his mother and father had just disowned him.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

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Ted: Joe, do you think I'm dumb? Joe: No, I think you're Ted.

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Why was the girl crying when she got home? She got raped and mugged on the walk home

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A hindu and a muslim walk into a bar. They start arguing over their different fundamental religious beliefs and then considering it is an american bar, an american christian extremist quickly shoots them both for being " from that part of the world"

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Who row's? •Liam Findlay

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Why didn't George Washington get his drivers license? Cars were yet to be invented.

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why did the boy fall to the ground? He was struck by lightning

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So a guy says to his dog "hey man when you piss in the toilet can you please flush, just because I don't like to look at your pee." then the dog sits back and says "...woof !!"

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Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls.

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What do you call a blonde who passed the SAT's? An excellent student.

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What's worse than a bag of dead babies? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Jews.

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What did Kermit the frog say at Jim Henson's funeral? Nothing.

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Why did Stephen Hawking ask for pizza? Because he was hungry.

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What's the coolest place to be in the solar system? Uranus.

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An anteatter walks into a bar, the bar tender says "hey renee zellweger"

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why did the hater hate? everyone else has a much better life

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What is a black person's favorite color? There are many different colors and it would be unrealistic to believe that all the people of a single race would choose the same one as their favorite.

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Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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