There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

your mom is so fat that she had to start going to a gym to exercise and get her weight under control.

What's worse than finding a knife in your car? Finding a car in your knife.

There are 10 kinds of people in this world. Those who understand binaryy and those who dont.

your mom was so fat that she died.

What do you call a deer that has no eyes? I have no eyedeer

What do you call two babys with one head? I dont know either, answers on postcard please!

If the 49ers won the superbowl

Did you hear about the dyslexic insomniac that stayed awake all night wondering if there really is a dog?

A mother with a bum hip and her son go to walk up a set of stairs in the mall. The floor was slippery because the janitor just mopped the floor. They decide to take the elevator instead.

What is the difference between a calendar and you? A calendar has dates!!

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Mets.

WHATS BROWN AND SMELLS LIKE CRAP!?!?!?!?!?!?!? crap

A Christian walks into a bar . . . mitzvah.

Why does it get hot after a basketball game? Because of the crowd all breathing out carbon dioxide and the high level of activity generating excess body heat.

Rebecca Blacks walk into a bar. She gets shot.

Why was the ghast from minecraft crying? His family died

The duck didn't cross the road.

What do you call a black man riding a bicycle? A good citizen who cares about the environment.

your mother eats so many chocolates and sugary confectionary that i would recommend a check up the the dentist.

Why did the plane crash? Because its pilot was a loaf of bread

why did the man choke at the lunch table. Police there is a banana attacking me what should I do?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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