I needed to write an article about heart disease so I did some research. I learned a lot.

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The once was a little girl named Suzy who liked swings; the only trouble was that she had no arms. In order to avoid having any jokes written (and recycled thousands of times) about this fact, she decided to run a sponsored marathon in order to pay for prosthetic arms. Suzy swung happily for the rest of her days. [L]

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2 muffins were in the oven when one turned to the other and said. "Damn it's hot in here" The second muffin looked at him with a shocked expression and exclaims "She's burning the potatoes!"

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How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them Why did Jane fall off the swing She has no arms Why did Jack drop his ice cream cone He got hit by a bus Did you know that if you pretend to eat salt you can actualy taste it Do this in public. Why was 6 afraid of 7 Numbers can't think This is the original anti joke A man walked into a bar he is an alcoholic and is distroying his family. Fin a penny pick it up and all the day you will have good luck Until you get hit with a car door. A man is SCUBA diving when he is almost out of air so he takes one breath an holds it to the surface The trip is so long that his lungs explode do to a change in pressure so he died.

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how did harry styles get in one diretion god

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Two muffins are put in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "is it just me or is it getting hot in here?". The other muffin says,"HOLY CRAP!!!!! A TALKING MUFFIN!!!!".

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Why didn't the ghost go to the dance? He didn't exist.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Skeletons neither have muscles nor brains to control any muscles and therefor cannot transport themselves across a road or any stretch of land for that matter.

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Ok good, just checking. It would be a shame for your perishable foodstuffs to go bad.

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Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

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When is a door not a door? When your house burns down.

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If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

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Q: What's grey and rocky? A: A grey rocking hair

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Why couldn't little Jeffy find his way to gumdrop palace? Because he was shot

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Why was Little Billy crying? He had cancer. Why was Little Sally crying? Little Billy's cancer was contagious.

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What is worse than getting a cold ? Finding a dead baby in your mailbox

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a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

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Why couldn't Sammy ride a Bicycle? -Because Sammy is a Fish

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There not the girl

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What is worst than a1000 baby's stapled to a tree? 1 baby stapled to 1000 trees.

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A boy walks into a bar, then walked out. He's not 21!

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Vote this down and get DOXED

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Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock, whos there? Not sally

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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