Whats brown and sticky? A antelope.

how many blondies were at the mall? none they were too busy trying to find the sun.

Three cows are sitting in a field The first cow says, "MOOOO!" The second cow says, "MOOOO!" The third cow says, "MOOOO!"

I got put through anger management when I was a child it made me mad.

What do you call a piece of Swiss cheese with human characteristics? Abnormal.

Why did the boy die of Cancer? Because I took some radioactive chemicals and hen I feel like it I beat him with it.

What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? A fat kid sitting on you

Roses are red Violets are violet Why does it go like that anyways? ~Yasmin~

How are you doing today? I'm fine...Except for the rape.

Knock Knock. Who's there? [no one] After that day, Dave moves out of the house assuming that a ghost knocked on his door.

Yo momma is so stupid that the only test she passed was the mental retardation test.

what do you get when you cross a turkey with a goat? nothing you can't cross to genetically different spieces stupid

A black man goes down to Alabama in the 1960s; He gets lynched.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: He had no arms Q: Why did the frog fall out of the tree? A: He was stapled to the monkey's face

Roses are black violets are black I can't hear anything I'm Helen Keller .

A man punches a 3rd grader in the stomach. Not long after he is arrested and no longer is allowed within 500 feet of a public school.

Q: Whats worse than running out of hot water? A: having wyatt friedman poop on your chest, Hit him up on FB

why did jimmy stop eating his breakfast two Penn state officials knocked at the door

Its a long story, I got two balance nerves, I technically got four ear drums (relax you cant see it nor anything,neither can doctors without weird unpleasant stuff), I got about twice the number of synapses as regular people, and well, that makes me pretty damn good at some things, and a total retard at others.

What did the orange say to the lemon? We are both alike but a differnt color

ok, so a blue flower in a meadow dances valiantly, while being watched by a chipmunk. the king of the sky fairies ate an apple and a chicken and a pear, and a cumkwuat and frog legs and a bone and a library and a jeep and fig and a rhino and a sword but fairies don't have that big of mouths to eat all of that, so this never happened

ROSES ARE RED VILOTS ARE BLUE I HOPE YOU KNOW IM A JEW

Q. what is your favorite food? A. Chicken, burritos, sandwich, rice, hot dog, turkey, duck, carrot, broccoli, eggplant, apple, blueberry, pear, raspberry, blackberry, orange, grapes fries, chips, cheese, pretzels, worms, and candy canes.

What do you call 20 Investment Bankers buried to their necks in sand? A team building exercise at the beach sponsored by an Investment Bank.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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