An Octopus walked into a bar. He then died as he had been out of his natural habitat for an exceedingly long period of time. An octopus can only survive on land for 30 minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A giraffe walks into a bar and the bar tender asks "Why the long face?!" to witch he replied " I've just been mugged outside.".

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the man fall of his bicycle? Because someone threw a fridge at him

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q. What do you call a black pilot? A. A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q:what's faster than a black man with you t.v A:his brother with your laptop

thumb_up thumb_down -16

If you add two 1's together its 11 if you add two 2's together its 22 If you add two 3's together its 33 So what happens if you add 4 and 4? No you dumb-ass its not 44, its 8

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did Dmitri say to all his friends? Nothing he has no friends

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you make Yoda sad? Kill all of his friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Once upon a time there was a magical duck in a magical kingdom. Nothing interesting ever happened to it and it was eaten by a magical fox.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call two babys with one head? I dont know either, answers on postcard please!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

There once was a man from Nantucket, he was a very nice person and had many friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Your family tree is like a cactus, its full of pricks. ;P

thumb_up thumb_down -16

If you call Dani a dog one more time, lick a gooch nut suckers. XoXo Jamie <3

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How did the black person die? Of old age

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Knock Knock! Who is there? A 6ft tall black man who recently escaped prison that is requesting asylum in your lovely mansion. sounds legit.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I used to be into necrophilia, bestiality, and sado-masochism; but then I realized I was just beating a dead horse.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why can't Lake Mossman find his penis? Because he's a fat ass, and he doesn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why do we park in driveways and drive in parkways? Good question.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

One of my nipples is a different colour from the other two. Is this normal? The Doctor replied with the answer no and said you have cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a feminist that believes that all women have just as many rights as men? Stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you put a baby in a blender? Feet first, so you can see its expression. How do you get a baby out of a blender? With chips.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Hi

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What happens when you put a white shirt in the red see on a blue moon? It gets wet.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops