Whats worse than getting a B+ in Biology? Getting raped by a scorpion.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did Harry Potter say when he lost his wand? Where's my wand?

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the flag say to the pole? It dosnt

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

thumb_up thumb_down -12

There's two blondes a black man and a camera man...

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Yo mama's so fat that when she went to go get an x-ray, they had to use the one they have at the zoo.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Rose are red, Violets are blue, I have AIDS, Now so do you.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Did you hear about the kid from Oklahoma? Yeah, he died.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Having a self-conscious baluga hold a gun on you while you hand him all the money you have on you, then realizing balugas are creatures indigenous to aquatic regions, and then realizing you are deep under water and are probably about to die from suffocation

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? you open the door and guide him inside

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Chip and Dale walk into a bar. Chip is black now.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why did Sarah fall of the swing... she had no arms Knock Knock.... Whos there .... Not Sarah

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why did the chicken cross the road? he didnt.. that kinda shit never happens

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Two giant paint bubbles!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree, because it was dead. why did the second monkey fall out of the tree, becuase it was dead. why did the third monkey fall out of the tree, because he thought it was a game!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why did the boy get hit by a bus? because he was black

thumb_up thumb_down -12

I was bangin this girl and she kept yelling the wrong name. Who's rape??

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what did the homeless man get for Christmas? nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A forty-year-old man forces a young child to strip down and take a shower. The child screams and cries, but the man persists angily. He then carries the child into his bed. The child pleads, "Help! Mom, make him stop!" The mother yells back, "Just listen to him. He's your father and it's past your bedtime." This is a common night-time routine for parents with their first child

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. Guys holocaust jokes aren't funny Anne-Frankly, I do nazi the point in them.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Once there was a dog, another one came to it and then there were two.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the cow cross the road? Because he escaped the farm and didn't know what else to do.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops