Roeses Are Red Violets Are Blue He's The One For Me And Not For You, And If You Try To Take My Place I Will Take My Fist And Smash Your Face(:

thumb_up thumb_down -3

If life throws you melons, you should do your best to avoid them. Large and hard objects such as melons can easily harm you if moving at high speeds. Fortunately, life is not a physical entity that can throw melons or anything else - so the chances of this event occurring to you are exceedingly low.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

how do you stop a baby from crawling in circles??????? you nail its other hand to the floor

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock Knock Sadly the old woman was death and didn't hear the door knock.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Damn Nero... So you are saying there is no hope left, the underground society is dead and buried.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Your mom is so old that she most likely will die soon.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A Jew, a Russian, and a Turk walk into a bar. The Jew asks, "Can I get a glass of Manischewitz?" The bartender serves him. The Russian asks, "Can I get a shot of vodka?" The bartender serves him. The Turk then asks, "Can I get a Turkish coffee?" The bartender looks at him, confused, and says, "Sorry, but this is a bar. Unfortunately we don't serve coffee."

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Before her maiden voyage, they told the Titanic she could become anything. So she became a submarine.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: Where do zombies shop? A: Zombercrombie.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats worse than getting shot in the foot? Watching each member of your family get shot in the foot.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is both deaf and blind. Driving would be an extremely hazardous action for herself and other nearby drivers.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the chair break? The person that sat in it was over weight

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Coke or Pepsi? Trick question, beer.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock Knock Who’s there? Your son Your son who? Your son who’s sick of having a paranoid mother who won’t just open the door!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

salad days!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How many immature teenagers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Your Mum.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Jax vs Pig Jax: HOHAHOHOHAHOHAHOHA... Etc Pig *spinning head like neck is gonna break off* Shao Kahn: FINISH HIM! Jax: GOT YA! OH YEAH... BEASTIALI*Y, BEAST*ALITY? AGAIN?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did little Timmy scrape his knee? He was launched off of an aircraft carrier.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What happened to the chicken when it crossed the road? Nothing because the cars that almost hit it swerved off the road.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bigger worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did Sidney drop her ice cream? A refrigerator fell on er

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What the problem with writing an anti-joke? Trying to not come up with a punchline.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the black man do when he found a bucket full of KFC chicken on the ground? He promptly looked around for anyone who might have bought it. After searching around, with no takers, he ate some of the chicken and saved the rest. He brought it back to his apartment and left it in his fridge, so he may later eat it as leftovers.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

The Princess is in another castle

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops