Chuck Norris threw a grendade, killed 50 people, then it exploded This is a highly improbable event considering no man is faster then a grenade

Roses are red. Violets are blue. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT IS.

What's long and black? A 12 inch black dick.

Wanna hear a race joke?.....whoops, ya missed it

What did the man do when he got home from work? Hit his wife.

Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

Guess what else smells like tuna!?! A dead tuna fish in a can

Whats worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Having a Hippo give you head.

What do you call a clock that neither ticks nor tocks? A broken clock

Why did the man throw a clock? In retaliation for his wife having thrown a vase at him. The couple has a history of domestic violence. More than one friend has suggested counselling.

A man walks into a bar, ouch!

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" Turns out a man suffering from schizophrenia believes he is a bartender for animals as his health slowly declines as his family comes to visit him every day.

- Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - KGB wh........... *slap* - vwe vwill ask the questions!!!!!!! - Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - Mom the KGB is here again....... - i dont care just answer the damn door - 5 seconds later nobody answers the door....... u here a crash and all of a sudden big men run in with guns - one comes over and slaps the mother while he continues to say " the KGB vwill vwait for no one!!!!!" - every body in the house is shot and and the KGB goees on to tlive normal lives........ for the KGB

Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

When you have read this, you've already read it.

A Muslim walks into a bar. No-one survived the blast.

Q:What do you call a black priest? A: A great quality volunteer at a local church.

What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

What is square and grey? A grey square.

How do you confuse a black man? Call him from a blocked number and I say "I love you"

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? the redneck got to him first.

What's scarier than a ghost? Practically anything as ghosts aren't real.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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