Why cant Hellen Keller read? Because shes dead!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a woman outside of the kitchen? Out of place.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: What do you call a cow wearing a hat? A: A cow wearing a hat.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

i stole a monkey from a man in a yellow hat his name is george now his name is i hate you

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Where's my baby??

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do u call a gay dinosaur Tyran a sore arse

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Invisible Children Foundation.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the man fall of his bicycle? Because someone threw a fridge at him

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A bear just broke into my house and im scared…...... Oh wait thats just my 350 pound teacher… now i'm even scareder

thumb_up thumb_down -17

guy walks into a bar. other guy says to him, "are you blind"? "yes", he answered.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

i think dylan is turnimg gay for amy

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: What were Peter's emotions after he bought his $2 million house? A: None, in fact he has no home, family and anyone to help him. his leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why did the boy drop the ball. he was shot in the head.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Life is like a box of chocolates. Sometimes you get the shitty coconut ones.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

I drive in driveways. I recite in recitals. I play in plays. I park on parkways. My greenhouse is green. And my boxing ring is round. Why does everyone think I'm weird??

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: The president is driving down the road, when the wheels of his boat fall off. How many ping pong balls does it take to fill the Empire State Building? A: False. Vests don't have sleeves.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did tarzan say when he saw 100 elephants coming over the hill? Look there's 100 elephants coming over the hill What did tarzan say when he saw 100 elephants coming over the hill with sunglasses on? Nothing he did not recognize them

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Yo mama so dumb she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl! I'm sorry,that was just really rude of me. I've been talking to my therapist and I think this insolent behavior came from my dad. I always wanted his approval but he always liked my brother more and blah blah yak yak.....

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you get when you cross an Indian and a duck? An Indian duck.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because this chicken had a mental disability and saw on the news that there was a hospital on the other side of the road that could treat his illness and possibly save his life, allowing him to fulfill his life-long dream of retirement. But knowing that chickens do not possess the brain power capable of understanding the situation that this chicken was in, it had probably gotten lost and just wandered off.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the monkey cross the road? It didn't. It died!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

If you'd turn to page 43 you will find the homework. Have a good weekend!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops