How do you kill Glenn Campbell? Stab him with a screwdriver.

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what has one ear, one leg, one eye, one arm, and is Jewish half a Jew

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hi joshua

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It was Valentines Day today, I thought I should get her something... I brought flowers to her grave.

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A grandma writes to her young grandson every day over e-mail with funny lines and pictures,He shows his parents a joke she sent him it reads- "A guy walks into a bar.. He says ouch" They then read on and call the police.They say "Son go to your room.. you're being stalked by a pedophile.. Your grandma has been dead since last year.. we are sorry"

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roses are red, violets are blue, i dont like to rhyme, but i do like to poo.

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Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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im passing this on from a friend: 2 blondes walk into a building, you think one woulda saw it,

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Two gophers are in a tank One of them says how the heck do you drive this thing?

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Why didn't Avery die when he got hit by a bus? The bus was going three miles per hour.

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What? Huh?

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Why did the little boy fall down? Be he had the downs.

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Q:What's worse than watching the show Jersey Shore? A:Nothing.

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If an ice cream van goes out of business, who drove the Jeep into the furniture store? To get to the other side.

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whats worse than the holocaust? nothing

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why was the mother sad? her sons school was bombed by terrorists. there we no survivors

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How many republicans does it take to raise the debt ceiling? Technically, none, as the president has the right to do this based on the 14th amendment.

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what do you call a black who stabbed your entire family? it all depends on what his name happens to be

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11th September jokes are just plane wrong.

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what do You call a white man killing a black man? a accident

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Why did the hipster get burned? Because he was a volunteer fireman.

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What is the difference between a pig and a crow? One is a animal that Is butchered to be eaten as a wonderful meat product. And the other is a pretentious asshole bird that no one likes.

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An alien spacecraft picks up human transmissions from Earth. They continue on in silence and disgust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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