an atheist and a christian meet in a bar they chat about football, order some pints, and have a really good night.

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"Torture the orphans as much as you want. Who they gonna tell? Their parents?"

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Jimmy: Knock Knock Nick: Whose there? Jimmy: Joe Nick: Joe Who? Jimmy: Joe Mamma Nick: No shes dead.

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What is orange and smells like oranges? Oranges.

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A man on an airplane is extremely frustrated by a small, screaming child. He puts on his headphones and listens to music.

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What's worse than being fired? Eating a bucket of diarrhea.

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Why did Timmy masticate in front of everyone at the dinner table? If he hadn't, he would have choked on large chunks of food.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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What do you call a good anti-joke? something you feel like you should go to hell for laughing at.

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Q: How do you starve a Black family? A: By not giving any Food.

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Patrick, I just thought of something funnier than 24. Lemme hear it. 25.

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Q:whats the wost thing that can happen to you when you find something? A:not finding something

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English.It is confused by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

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Why couldn't the man stop dancing? Because he had Parkinson's.

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What's Funny About A Black Man Being Shot? Nothing, That Man Was My Friend.

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If somebody stabs you in the forehead, you are likely to get injured.

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Why was Martin Luther King shot? The shooter strongly disagreed with his viewpoints.

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Stephen Hawking

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because it broke...

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Q: How do you know a chinese guy robbed your house? A: your homework is done, your computer is updated, and 2 hours later he is still trying to back out of your driveway

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Who is the best person to do your nails with? Nobody, you have no friends.

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what did the man say to the other man? hey

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it is an animal without a high enough level of intelligence to see the dangers in doing so.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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