Roses are brown Violets are brown There is crap in my garden

My heart is in my hands. Call an ambulance.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

how do you kill a baby? introduce it to alice cooper

What do bluejays and cardinals have in common? They both Were born during the Medevil period.

A man walks into a bar and sees a depressed looking giraffe. The man says, “Why the long neck?” The giraffe responds, “That’s not the expression.”

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink successfully, pays, and leaves. Three weeks later he dies tragically.

Q. What did the Muffins say to the man? A. Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects therefore unable to speak.

Knock knock, Whos there? Your adopted.

A guy thought it could be funny to write a joke that is not and post it on a social network. And did it

I scream, you scream, we all scream for shit

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

The EPA.

Womens Rights

Why do you never want to party with Lindsay Lohan? Because she's a drug abuser and a terrible influence.

why aren't black people real? they are. just because they are less visible at night makes no difference.

what did the scene kid get for christmas? a gift card which he used ironically.

A guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender asks why the long face. The guy responds because cancer is a horrible disease. Oh yah did I mention the guy has cancer? $

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Twinkle Twinkle little wh**e close youre legs youre not a door. youre gonna get an S,T,D, youree only wanted cause youre free... Twinkle Twinkle little Wh**e youre cheeper then the dollar store

Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

Ok is 25 really funnier than 24 because i think 8008 or 5318008 are way funnire tahn 24 or 35 just saying

Velcro. What a rip off.

Why is moral man a great Cerebrity? you would not get it, its too cerebral... Moral: I SAID LEAVE HIM ALONE PLEAAAAAAAAAASE! BUAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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