Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

There is a bus full of puppies and babies with a plane flying above it carrying 2 tons of explosives. The Bus arrives safely at its destination.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do u call a bunch of white dudes siting on a bench ......the NBA

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the chicken change the projector reel? To get to the other slide.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest for drug trafficking and possession of illegal firearms. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say...

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill? A: mudslide

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I hate weddings! Old people always poke u and say "ur next" so I've decided to do the same to them... At Funerals

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A black man walks into a store. As he leaves, the detector goes off. It turns out the sales clerk had forgotten to take out one of the tags on his purchase. The sales clerk promptly took it off, and the man left to enjoy the rest of his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Whats worse then the Holocaust? Chlamydia.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

the WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down -7

toby limbers is gonna follow in his uncles footsteps, the gay ones

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you get when someone tells you an anti joke? An anti joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Canadians

thumb_up thumb_down -7

jack and jill went up the hill to have a little fun. that dumb ass jill forgot the pill and now they have a son

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock knock. Who's there? Andy. You're late, I've been piss-arsing about waiting for you to get here.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the car catch fire? It was parked in Ferguson, MO

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a tape worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

There once was a man from Nantucket, He sailed a boat.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why didn't the man go to work on Friday the 13th? Because he was unemployed.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops