Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet eating her curds and way, along came a spider who sat there beside her and asked, "Hey bitch what's in the bowl?"

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Q. How do you wake up a sleeping rich man? A. By splashing acid in his face

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Knock Knock Who's There? Jehovah's Witness

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Q:Why are all of the vampires extinct? A:AIDS is a serious disease. You shouldn't joke about it.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why didnt the vampire have a reflection? You have to be real to have a reflexion

thumb_up thumb_down +26

The air is green The grass is blue I'm bot stoned.. I'm just high

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Q: whats worse than being in the car for 1hour A: being in the car for 2 hours Made by: grant chapman:)

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk, idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A man invites his Irish friend to his house. "Would you like something to drink?" the man asks. "Just kidding, we don't have any drinks." Later, they die of dehydration.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Jews are human beings. Pizza is a type of food.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What did the white man do when he got a black eye? He thanked the gracious african-descented donor, and with a little luck he just might see his beautiful wife and kids again

thumb_up thumb_down +26

George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A young boy is concerned about the well- being of his father, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Put chromosomes in advertising. Because you know, Sex Cells

thumb_up thumb_down +24

You scream I scream We all screamed when the chicken crossed the road

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Whats the difference between a nigro and a nigro... They are both BLACK!

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did Mary say to Vishnikharmut? You're name is weird. What did Vishnikharmut say to Mary? Your grammar is incorrect.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A boy and a girl are each granted a wish Girl: I want us to be lovers until the end of the world Boy: I want the world to end

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding worms in your stool.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Roses are red, violets are red. Aaaaaahh! My garden's on fire!

thumb_up thumb_down +24

You go to the Anti Joke website, what do you find under the "newest" section? Black jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do a goat and an eagle have in common? They both can fly, except for the goat.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops