Q: Whats the difference between porno and your mom? A: I can masturbate to porno

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whats more embarissing rhan being raped by a squirel? Being a 40 year old virgin working at mcdonalds

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Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete fell off. Who was left? Nobody because Repeat is a good friend and he went in after Pete.

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A woman stopped making sandwiches.

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Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

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Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

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What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

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Why did Susie fall off the swingset? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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Q: What's worse than not having a good relationship? A: Starving Africans

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Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

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Why did the black guy stop his car? There was a stop sign

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if bought jim bought 78 sweets and he eats 68 what does jim have left? diabetes

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how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

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What do you call a black man that has a family with a white woman? A good husband and father who had a stable job in a not so stable economy. The current issues of inflation has made it hard for him, but his dedication pays his bills and feeds his family. He later will die a sad death caused by prostate cancer at the age of 47.

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Why did the baby duck cry? Because his family just got ran over by a truck

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Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

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What did the douche bag get for Christmas? Your girlfriend.

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A fireman walks into a bar. Everyone has burned alive already, and he's too late to save them.

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My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a black guy board a plane. Who gets kicked off first? The jew for his unruly behavior towards the flight attendant.

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There is a high speed pursuit when suddenly the suspect's car skids out of control and crashes into a field. Two cows witness the commotion, when one turns round to the other and says "Moo"

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Q: Why did the Jew fit in with the White people? A: Because he, and his compatriots, have accepted the view of Judaism as a religion, and perhaps a lifestyle -- but not a race.

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How many shots do you have to take to start feeling light-headed? Ask JFK.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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