The speakers on my computer were broken, so I was going to replace them with John Boehner. Because he is the SPEAKER of the house.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he was raped.

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Brock is a massive b00b who likes da siiiiiii

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What happened to the woman driver who drove to Tesco? Due to the pleasant traffic conditions, she arrived slightly earlier than expected and she finished her weekly shop in forty minutes. She returned home, once again in good traffic and ate a delicious lunch of sausages and chips.

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what goes ha ha ha ..plop? We are all going to die.

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Why did the cow cross the road? The slaughter yard was on the other side!

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what is the difference between a dead baby in a bag and a dead baby hung in the yard....the dead baby hung in the yard was shot down off the cross after being rmr'd

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice-cream? He was run over by a bus and died instantly.

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I walked across a lake once. Someone said "JESUS CHRIST!" to which I replied with "YES?"

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your window is open I'm watching you

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what do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? last years hide and go seek champion

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You know whats better than cold pizza? Winning a nobel prize.

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Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she is legally blind

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What happened to the little boy that went to The Penn State locker room? He had a great day meeting the team and watching the football game.

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Q: When is a door not a door? A: Before it has been asembled or after it has been taken down and no longer maintains the physical form of that which a door typically has.

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Q: What kind of punch do vampires drink ? A: None... It's really blood, you should know that by now.

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what do you call a black guy under water? A Scuba Diver

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Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

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What's the difference between shoes and babies? You can't eat shoes.

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Whats gay and smells like paint? A gay man covered in paint.

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What type of jobs do black people have? That depends entirely on their qualifications and suitability to the relevant role.

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Where did sally go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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A man is sleeping and is woken up. What does he say? Why did you wake me up

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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