How do u wake up lady gaga You go into her room and yell at her

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Q: Why was the balloon scared of unicorns? A: Buses dont exist therefore the balloon was just insane.

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What happened when the man fell off the boat? He went into the water and was viciously mauled by 5 alligators then ran over by another boat.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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why did michael jackson write black or white he didnt want black people to copy him

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Imagine yourself in a box with no windows and no doors. How do you get out? Stop imagining.

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Why did the black guy go to jail? Because he committed an illegal crime.

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whats red round and gets smaller? a baby combing its hair with a potatoe peeler

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Wenis Penis

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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What's worse than having a worm in your apple? 2012.

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I man walks into a bar. He drinks four beers, gives the bartender his keys, and takes a cab home. The next day he gets his best friend to drop him off at the bar, picks up his car, and is three minutes early to work.

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What did the twin towers order from the pizzeria? Two large Plane

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Why did my toaster break? because it was made in china

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Q: Why did the black man shit himself? A: He experienced post-mortem bowel release after he was murdered due to his racial identification.

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Why did the fish but the house Because it wanted to eat the house

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.der era sesoR .eulb era steloiV .sdrawkcab nettirw saw ecnetnes sihT .yrgnuh m'I won dnA

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A man walks into a bar. His family has died in a tragic accident and he is trying to drink down the pain.

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Why are female badgers more attracted to the smell of cheese than male badgers? I don't know. Ask Bill Snodgrass

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How do you fit an elephant inside your car? I don't understand why this task would even need to be performed. I have never arrived anywhere in my car and thought "Sure could use an elephant right about now..."

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

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What did the black guy say after coming home from school? "I just got home from school."

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Have you ever ate a donut? Yes I have. In fact, the donut I ate recently was fairly delicious.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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