Two Pigs are in a bath. One pig says to the other "pass me the soap", to which the other pig replies "Do I look like a typewriter?"

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What did the bartender say to the fat guy? Hi

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Q: Who was shot 50 years ago? A: Abraham Lincoln was shot 50 years ago! (=

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how does chuck norris eat an apple Just like every other person

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two muffins are sitting in an oven one muffin turns and says "boy it`s hot in here" the other muffin can`t bring himself to explain to the other they are about to be eaten alive.

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how come the tadpoles dad told him he can't be a nurse? he has 2 b a frog!

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Michael Jackson walks into a bar. Everyone runs out, screaming, "AH, a dead guy is walking!"

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How do you stop a bus from hitting you?? You throw small children to impede the progress of the bus.

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Your mom's so ugly that after being ridiculed for for year she became very self conscience and killed herself. Her family was very sad for many years.

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What do a porkchop and a watermelon have in common? They're both edible, organic, and delicious. Also, both are fun to throw at people.

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A drum and a cymbal fall off a cliff...

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How many turrets patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? Cocksucker!!

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A duck walks into a bar and says, "Put it on my bill"

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What do you call a man holding a bible? A man holding a bible. What do you call a woman holding a bible? A women holding a bible. What do you call a man and a women holding a bible? A man and a women holding a bible.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hello there. I am Elder Young and I with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. What would you say if someone were to offer you peace and happiness through all of eternity?

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Never mind that. I have a gun and your child. Come out with all your valuables and he won't get hurt.

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hold the planet Dumb ass well I'm doing something else right now dumb ass

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A man and a women are having sex. He farted so she left before he came.

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What's black and white and red all over? Obama covered in red paint.

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My favorite color is Ham. And I can count to Potato.

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Whats the difference between anne frank and osama bin laden? Nothing. They were both found eventually.

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Q: How many elephants can fit inside a Volkswagen Beetle? A: Four.

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Q:Whats not funny? A: Antijokes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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