Two latino men are drinking at a bar. Suddenly, one man falls off his barstool, unconscious. Later that day, he was diagnosed with pancreatitis, and died never having dealt with his severe alcoholism.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What happened to the guy who bought a nice, brand new, plasma screen t.v.? He hanged himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a exceptionally funny anti joke? Well, usually cruel and extremely vile.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Your momma's so fat she has a hard time finding clothes to fit

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What happens when you give a Parrot a pack of cigarettes? Animal Rights Activists get upset and condemn your actions.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than the holicost? The ninja turtles

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A white guy, a black guy, and an asian guy jump off a bridge. Who hits the ground first? It doesn't matter. They are all going to die.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My name's Dave, Microwave!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Many of people would like to know this question. We have not invented a mind reading device and chickens can't communicate with humans. So no one knows

thumb_up thumb_down +8

:D STORY TIME! :D ... :D So once upon a time there was a... :) Uhm... :\ I forgot... Sorry :(

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was the black guy running away with a sack full of money? He was rushing to local charity to donate the money. It was closing in 2 minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Gotta disappoint you there, you see there are hundreds, perhaps thousands of similar organizations which work for the government, and those I work for are black ops, meaning that I would be putting my life in danger if I told you anything about it besides that fact. Its not listed anywhere, its not FBI, its not legislated by any government yet many governments invest their funds there, you could call it something like the interpool, and something like the underground society, except its multi-government driven... A term I sincerely do not fully understand myself, I have certain talents I put to use, but I lack the education in order to be more than a employee for these people.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why didn't Tyron run from the police? He had no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock? Who's There? Sgt Constable Ian. Sgt Constable Ian Who? It's Sgt Constable Ian - I'm here to see you about your alleged rape charges.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did Justin Bieber jump out of the airplane? He didn't, i pushed him

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! :)

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what do you call a rich, gay guy from Florida? Iron man

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are about to be executed by a firing squad. Before they shoot the brunette, they ask if she was any last words. “Look, a tornado!” Then they shoot her.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you stop an African outlaw who uses child soldiers? Angelina Jolie

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the boat sink I shot a missile at it

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the boy get teased? Because his name was spelt wrong (k)urtis

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops