what's worse than failing a test? having your house burnt down

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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What can fly, but is always under you? A flying worm.

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How do you make a plummer sad? Kill his family.

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Why did the aeroplane fall out of the sky? An ant jumped on it

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What do you call a Jewish dinosaur? Fossil Fuel

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whats funnier than womens rights? ottos weight

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What do you call a fat zombie? Dead

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what class did Jimmy get an A in? None, he is dyslexic

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What did Helen Keller name her pet dog? dfhiwueghweigw

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I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! In for a penny, in for a pound. I'm Donald Trump!

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A Jew, a Russian, and a Turk walk into a bar. The Jew asks, "Can I get a glass of Manischewitz?" The bartender serves him. The Russian asks, "Can I get a shot of vodka?" The bartender serves him. The Turk then asks, "Can I get a Turkish coffee?" The bartender looks at him, confused, and says, "Sorry, but this is a bar. Unfortunately we don't serve coffee."

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Why didn't George Washington get his drivers license? Cars were yet to be invented.

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A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will you have for dinner? The duck says "quack".

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how do you drowned a blonde? put ankle weights on her and throw her in a river.

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Roses are red,violets are blue, dont read my words, says the ring of lords.

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Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender: why the long face Horse: I'm dying of an incurable cancer...

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A young black man walks into a KFC. He takes a quick stop in the bathroom and continues on the road to his ivy league college.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm going to murder you Did you look behind you?

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How many lollipops does it take to shingle a dog? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

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Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

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What's more boring than watching grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops