An African American walks into a bar. The bar tender is a racist, so he asks the African American gentleman to leave.

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What did the man do to the begging orphan on a cold Christmas morning? He kicked him.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Conscience. Conscience who? Oh, sorry about that Hitler, you wouldn't know who I am.

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How did the Mexican get into the United States? He applied for a Visa and was granted authorization to live and work in the United States on a permanent basis.

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how did helen keller's parents punish her? stuck a plunger in the toilet

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Why did the duck cross the road? Because he wanted to. Problem, AntiJoke community?

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What's long, black, and the tip is shaped like a mushroom? A mushroom.

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How many Stephen Hawkings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He can't.

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Whats the difference beetween a pilgrim and a jack-o-lantern? Jack-o-lanters didn't discover america.

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A man and a woman are having sex. The man finishes and says, "Oh, God, I hope you're on the pill." The girl says she isn't and begins to cry. Lacking a job or a stable life, the man leaves the woman. The woman has an abortion and suffers irreversible damage to her ovaries.

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There is a boy in a school............. SUDDENTLY, PEDOBEAR APPEARS!

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An american, a french and a japanese walk into a bar. They are colleagues from the International University of Florida, used to go out together.

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What's orange and rhymes with a parrot. A carrot

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at its face.

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Q: Why were minorities denied access to the bathroom? A: It was for employees only.

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Whats worse than 1 bee sting? - 2 Whats worse than 2 bee stings? - Holocaust Whats worse than the Holocaust? - 3 bee stings Now, if you are smart, you would notice that no one really alive today was in the Holocaust, therefore you can not make an accurate comparison between bee stings and the millions of Jews being killed. -SPG

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Jack and Jill ran up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and died.

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What do you call a snake at a snail convention? A snake at a snail convention.

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Roses are cars, violets are rude, this poem makes no sense, neither do you

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an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

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What do Lincoln, JFK, and Barack Obama all have in common? They were all president of the United States of America and are relatively good people.

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Knock Knock ............... No one's home.

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So there was a guy in the middle of the street, how did he survive? ...He doesnt because he gets hit by a car becuase hes in the middle of the street...

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Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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