On the dora show when they asked where the Monster was why did the arrow point left instead of right?? Because it was scared

T-rex: If you're happy and you know it clap your hands, oh...

Man#1: Who's John? Man#2: John is John. Who else do you want him to be? Why do you ask stupid questions? Are you naturally this dumb? Do you like the questions I ask? Man#1: (Turns away as he is deeply offended by the man who rudely answered his question.)

What starts with F and ends in UCK? The F word but im not allowed to say it.

Q: Whats worst than the Holocaust A: If a second Holocaust happened, and then you found an apple in your apple

What happens when a baby stops crying? it dies.

What's awesome and rides a unicycle? Rollercoasters. I lied about the unicycle.

why did the platypus fall out of a tree it couldnt even climb up the tree

What do you call a drunk, blind, deaf monkey driving a car? A bloody good driver!

?"i'm so turned on right now." - horny light bulb

Why did the piece of gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chicken's foot.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am staraiL so dont touch me!!!!!

Three men walk into a bar, one ducks and two fall down. What happened? They walked into a metal bar, like a sideways flagpole!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You smell like ass, And no one loves you!

do you have snow in your vagina? because i am going to plow you

Whats the difference between KFC and Starbucks? KFC didn't murder your sister.

WHat did the Somalian girl get for Christmas? AIDS

There is an American, a Mexican, and a Muslim on a plane They give the American the 1 parachute and the Mexican and the north koreon explode

Why can't Lake Mossman find his penis? Because he's a fat ass, and he doesn't have any arms.

Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

What do you call a Jew talking on a cellphone ? Well one should mind his/her business and shouldn't call people names and discriminate against them on religious or ethnic grounds .

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A hat.

I want some pudding. but I didn't have my meat. how can I have pudding?

Why doesn't the farmer have a dog? He doesn't like dogs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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