Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat low calorie foods because she wants to lose weight.

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how do you complete an exam. dont be kaizen.

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Jesus Christ

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Q: what did the old man do to the little boy in his dark cellar while babysitting on a stormy night? A: told him to hold a flashlight because the power went out and he needed to find his electric generator.

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What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk

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How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two, but I don't know how they got in there.

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Q: What can a black man do that a llama can't? A: Walk

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How did sonic run at the speed of sound because he was fast

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What did the farmer say when he couldnt find his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

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Potatoes have skin. I have skin. Therefore, I am a potato.

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Tim: You wanna hear an anti-joke? Billy: Yes! Tim: Okay, I've got one for you Billy: Let's hear it! Tim: 1

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Why did the monkey cross the road? Because he saw the chicken do it.

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A black man walks into a bar in an all white neighborhood. He has a couple of drinks, pays for them, and politely calls a taxi for a ride home.

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What do u when life gives u lemons? U put them in your iced tea.

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How else can an Asian wear a contact lens? Too bad for them. They can;t sucks for them. Asians with small eyes EXCEPT FOR INDIANS look ugly

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a fridge halfway through walking.

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wanna hear a dirty joke? ...trashcan

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What's worse than eating half a worm? Eating somebody's brain.

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What happened to the Asian who ran into the wall with a boner? He ejaculated his sperm, impregnating the wall. The wall went to the authorities, and the man was charged with rape. He is now serving a 10 year prison sentence, with no possibility of parole.

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Knock Knock, Who's There? Not Ann Frank because she died in the Holocaust along with 6 million other innocent people.

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Why did the heroin addict get staff infection? His skin broke open multiple times without proper cleansing.

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What's funnier than 9/11? Nothing. 9/11 wasn't funny. It was a terrible tragedy, the most tragic in U.S. history. If you think that is funny you are a sick person. By: Logan in South Dakota

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Q: What did hitler say to his generals? a: In a circumstance as the one we have found ourselves in. Eliminating our most threatening of enemies would be very logical. Unless they were of the superior race therefore, it may be frowned apon by our low ranked comrades. Causing another assasionation attempt on myself. So in conclusion I believe eliminating a rich and intelligent race far more superior than our own, would be the best way to go. So collect the Jews of Warsaw and we might have a chance.

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what did John do to make the cold weather a little less irritating? well, being a homeless man, John did..... nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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