rent a cops

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I going to the kitchen to make a #sandwich.....oh wait this isn't twitter

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A black guy walks into a bar. He drinks some wine and exits the bar. -Lets Go Mets, not Yankees

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A penis walks into a bar..

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A duck walks ino a bar...... f*ck this sh*t im going to candy land.

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What the flower say to the bird. Nothing

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How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

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Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

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Why do cow say moo? Because you touch yourself at night

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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What happens when you get caught inside a tornado? You don't, the debris around you will most certainly kill you before you get close to the tornado.

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Chuck Norris was the leading role in the television show Walker, Texas Ranger.

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So a plane flies into a world trade centre... That's not funny

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What's black and Has 8 legs? Gang Rape.

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A polar bear and a seal are sitting on an ice floe. The polar bear looks at the seal and says, "RAWRRRRRRRRRGGG" and then kills and eats him.

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You wanna pop a bottle? I hope you are referring to bottles of water as I am underage and I refuse to partake in any said consumption of alcoholic beverages

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Roses are blue violets are red I think I'm getting drunk get me to my van

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-What did George Clooney say to Jennifer Lawrence? -"Hi!"

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1 black guy jumped off a cliff at the same time as a white guy, who fell first? The one who weighed the most.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Get a giant scorpion to rape him.

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What do you call a Black man sweeping the floor? A janitor.

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What did the elephant say to the pelican? He didn't say anything. I lied.

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Two fish we're in a tank.. Yup.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He had no legs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops