It takes a minute to know somebody, an hour to fall in love, but a lifetime to forget. Once, my mom forgot me at Disney World.

women's rights

Why did the man get fired from his Job? The boss became his ex girlfriend 2 minutes ago

Knock, knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who?

Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

What's black and white and enforces the rules at football games? A referee? Wow you're really smart.

why couldn't the blonde change the lightbulb? she couldn't find the leperchaun at the end of the rainbow

Q: What would George Washington do if he were alive today? A: Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

so a man walks into a bar, then the prison warden told him to calm doun.

Golf.

What do you get when you cross a chicken and a dinosaur? You can't. Dinosaurs are extinct.

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

A man goes to the doctor and complains: "Doctor, my Viagra hasn't worn off! It's been over eight hours!" The doctor replies "You were bitten by a banana spider. You have one day to live.

Roses are red Violets are blue Get in the shed I'm gonna screw you

What's worse than finding a fly in your soup? Being raped... What's worse than being raped? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two flies in your soup

Jamie Oliver eats a chip

Why did the black guy wear a hat? To keep the sun out of his eyes

Q:Why was the black guy carrying a gun A:He's a cop

Jet fuel doesn't melt steel beams,heat does.

I once went to a Haitian party, yea.. The DJ really brought the house down.

What's the best part about having sex with a 9 year old in the shower? Pedophilia is a crime, and the people that do it are very sick individuals. The fact that you even thought there was a 'best' part disgusts me.

what happens when Pinocchio says "My nose is growing"?

What is blue and feels like fluff? Blue fluff

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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