What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because their both fruits.

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Roes are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't rhyme, You're entire family has died. The plane that they were on went down due to a flock of geese getting sucked into the engine. They were visiting you for your twenty fifth birthday and wanted to surprise you. there were no survivors.

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This planking craze is really taking over... my elderly nextdoor neighbour has been planking in her garden for three days straight!

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Why couldn't John ride a bicycle? Because he is a fish.

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DING DONG! Did you have to ring the doorbell? You just ruined a good knock knock joke!

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This joke is stupid, Chuck Testa.

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Why was the boy embarrassed when he opened his parents' bedroom door? Because he had been trying the door for several minutes until he realized he was pushing instead of pulling.

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A guy with cancer walks into a bar... No one treated him any special way, it's not like he had I have cancer written on his forehead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

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Knock Knock! Who Is it? You, Tig

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What's the funniest part of a tomato? The skin.

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people say thers saftey in numbers, try telling that to 6 million jews

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot.. You racist bastard.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Knock knock whos there? Jake jake who? jake from state farm, and i'd like to tell you about our insurance company

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Irish sobriety

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what is green and smells bad? an orange dolphin that poops out rainbows.

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Fortunately," said the snooty maître d', "we'll let you come in without a Thai.

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a man and his son pull up out side b&q and the man says to his son run in there and get me a black n decker and the boy goes in and is standing in the power tools isle and he looks round and there is a lady standing next to him so he hit her, the woman happened to be black and 2 minutes later a security guard rushes round and says son what did u do that for and the son said my dad told me to come in and get a black n decker!

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A black, Kenyan man enters a race. He comes in second to last as he didn't practice as much as the other contestants.

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Wanna know way i don't eat grapes? I hate Grapes.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven. Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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A man walks into a bar and sees a man with a big orange head. The man asks the bartender, "Why does that guy have a big orange head?" The bartender replies," If you buy him a beer, maybe he'll tell you." So the man buys a beer and gives it to the man with the big orange head and asks why he has a big orange head. The man says, "One day I found a genie and my first wish was to be the richest man in the world, my second wish was to be married to the most beautiful woman in the world, and for my third wish, I told the genie,'Ya know, why don't you give me a big orange head."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To pick up the carcass of its road-killed younger brother and weep.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops