a horse walks into a bar, hours later it walks out on two legs and the man who saw it all happen couldn't believe his eyes. The man then turns to the bartender and says, "I theenk eye've had enuf, Cut me hoff!"

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So this guy is waiting for a heart transplant. He dies.

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I took my blind grandmother to the art gallary

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Why was the boy in a wheelchair raising money to buy a basketball uniform? Because wheelchair basketball is a popular sport

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Knock Knock who's there? Steve Steve who? Steve. I already told you my name.

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you're so stupid, you have trouble understanding what you read, like the newspaper, for example

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Why were the Dinosaurs wiped out? Porridge.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was mauled by a bear!

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why did the man paint his house? cause he never wanted to mow the lawn

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Why did the black man drown? Because he didn't wait 30 minutes after eating.

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Why did the boy hate his mom? She was a fucking bitch.

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What did the African get for dinner? Ebola Rice

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Whats worse than passing out drunk and having your friends draw on your face? When you die of alcohol poisoning in the morning

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how did the little black boy cross the river? he walked over the bridge.

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POOP.............................................. ITS THE FUNNEST WORD OF ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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A lonely man walks into a Self-Esteem class. He sits alone in the back because of his low self-esteem. Forever alone.

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How do you have problems paying your monthly mortgage if you live in a box emmanuel

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Why did the Jewish business man cross the road? A: to go to his reasonable paying job at a business.

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a black person was walking into his home. good thing balls like apple juice and Miley Cyrus was keeping guard with her sword.

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Why I am at the hospital now: True as it gets. I found on my working desk a small box of fluoride pills, I was like meh, but it said banana, strawberry, mint and pear, so I was like yeah! And grabbed a mouthful before going URGH! Then my friends entered laughing saying "I hope you do well on that test tomorrow!" So yeah, I passed out, and it turns out my "friends" (victims ill torture to they beg for death). 80 MG OF VALIUM!!! Yeah good trucking luck on my test eh? I nearly died twice, somehow, I think I should ask doc if my heart is okay or something, my head is fucked up the floor is all wavy and I cant differentiate numbers Seriously, one guy was gonna come visit say sorry, but he sent his girlfriend instead... My wife was so worried, that when I said: Mind if I have my vengeance by screwing his girlfriend? My wife said: I was so worried, you still okay? That actually sounds like a good scheme... So, yeah... I am typing this because, I am totally going to have a threesome... When and if my ever wakes up again... She agreed... She was always kinda into me but still! If you dont understand this, well... Next time, if you want to poison me, USE SOMETHING THAT KILLS ME! BECAUSE I WILL BE BACK!

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What did the cat say to the bird? Nothing. It's a cat.

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A dyslexic man into bar walks a.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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