Why did the boy do his homework? For fun.

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A dyslexic woman wears a bar.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet his friend the horse at a bar

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What happened to the hungry child? He got out of Africa

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you need 2 pple for this. Ask me if im a tree? Are you a tree? no

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A man walks into a bar at 1 in the afternoon. He's the bartender and a fellow employee asked him to cover the afternoon shift.

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why did the chicken cross the road? He saw his family getting murdered and tried to stop it but got hit in the process

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Why was it sad for black guys drove off a cliff? There two more seats

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A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

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PATIENT: Doctor, doctor, I can't see my legs DOCTOR: That's because you're blind

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Why did i try to write a funny joke? Cuz i was desperately bored.....

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Why should you never push a Mexican off a bike? Because he will file a lawsuit against you in the event of an injury.

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Caolan and Eamon

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Knock Knock Who's there? The electrician, I'm here to fix your door bell.

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What do a turtle and a bowling ball have in common? Nothing

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What do you get when you mix a bulldog with a shitzu? One delicious smoothie.

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yo momma so fat, Bob's furniture store is having a sale on wednesday at 5:00.

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A couple picks up a hitch-hiker with an ax on the side of the road. The hitch-hiker says "Thank you for the ride."

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A duck walks into a store and asks the clerk, "do you have any grapes?" The clerk says no, and the duck leaves. The next day, the same duck walks back into the store, and asks the clerk if they have any grapes. The clerk, slightly annoyed, says no again, and the duck leaves. The next day, the duck walks back in and asks again if they have any grapes. The pissed off clerk says, "No, and if you ask again i'm gonna nail your feet to the floor. The duck leaves. The next day, the duck walks back into the store, and this time he asks the clerk, "do you have any nails?" The clerk says, "Yes." The Duck leaves.

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A man walks into a bar and shuffles his way through the intoxicated patrons. He finds the only open stool and quickly sits in it before any other see it. The bartender approaches him and ask: "What will it be?" The man replies: "Can I have a beer?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He is seriously pissed off about being repeatedly subjected to this level of intense interrogation. Do you ask other animals why they chase their tails or claw at dirt? Do people ask you why you run when you're late? How would you like to have every move you made transformed into some cliche, old farce? There's a road, he's a chicken, there are only so many possible outcomes.

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one day there was an ugly barnicle. he was SSSOOO ugly that everyone died the end -patrick

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DAAAAAAAAMN! I AM BEHIND THE SQUARE WHEEL AGAIN! AND THAT SHIT IS POINTY! PRETENDING TO CARE IS SUCH A HASSLE! Anyway, I hope you know I was joking (otherwise you would totally be,not as smart as I thought) but yeah lets see, I am the fourth most pointless MAN, after "The square wheel", "My wife" (:)) I guess some guy just married the wrong wife huh?) And the the fucking wheel is a billion times more manly than Justin Bible or whatever you called that... Thing, and that wheel is made from a female tree! What? HAVE THE LAST COMMENT? I DO NOT GET HAVE! I GET TAKE BY FORCE! Well as far as comments and go, and sex of course.

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What would Chuck Norris do if you insulted him? Nothing. He probably doesn't have time for such foolishness.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops