A horse walks into a bar and begins to moo. Everyone is confused until it takes off its costume and reveals it's just a cow.

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How long does it take to paint a house with babies? It matters how hard you throw them.

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Whats The difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash And one is a watermelon

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair Fuzzy Wuzzy died of cancer

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

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What do you get when you stab a six year old with a pair of scissors and a machete? A very angry, potentially murderous mother out for revenge.

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I just met you, And this is crazy. So call me Kony, I stole you're baby.

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Q: What do you get when you cross a cactus and a platypus? A: I was wondering the same thing.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side.

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Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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two flowers in a meddow recently bloomed a cow came over and ate them, and the cow died of herpes the next day

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Ants are the Velociraptors of the insect world.

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whats worse then getting sat on by a hippo getting sat on by Matt Ross

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Knock knock. Who's there? No one, because your house burned down.

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Hey I'm a poet and I didn't even realize that I was a poet

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What did Petunia say to the other Petunia Hi there Petunia

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What did Woody say to Buzz? A lot. There were three movies.

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What do an airplane and a grape have in common? They both have wings, except the grape.

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What did the boy say to the girl seductively eating a banana? A: bananas are my favorite fruit

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How did the blonde trip the brunette? She stuck out her foot

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Roses aren't blue Violets aren't red She was my ex wife But now she's just dead.

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Rick Ross is so fat, that he is fatter than someone who isn't as fat as he is.

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A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "You know, you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate says, "I know, I was just raped by a group of men who thought it would be funny to humiliate me as much as possible. The bartender then called 911 seeing that a horrible crime had just been committed.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Parkinsons, ;oshgfs;jgbRHG

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops