Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Whose. There? Not Susie.

Q: How many times did the chicken cross the road? A: One and a half.

What did the kitty say when it's owner called him over? Nothing. It's owner killed him.

Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

roses are red violets are blue the sugar bowls empty so is your head

Ask me if im a tree? No

there were three men in a car, Poop, Shut Up, and Manners. They were driving in a truck when poop fell out of the car. Manners went to get him. Shut Up parked somewhere that he wasn't supposed to so the police man came to him. He asked him what his name was and he said "Shut Up" because that was his name. The police man said "Where are your manners?" then Shut Up said,"He went to go scoop up poop".

How many like does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? As many as it takes.

whats long, hard and full of seamen submarine

the anti-joke.com joke was just like a normal joke. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

why did the dog chase the cat? because the cat chased the dog first.

Did you hear the one about the dead guy? Apparently he was no longer living.

What is worse than braking a fingernail, Learing that a clown raped your entire family

What do you get when you fall in love? A guy with a pin to burst your bubble.

An American, a German, and a Mexican walk quickly into a room. They were late for a work meeting.

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "GESTAPO! AUFMACHEN!!!"

Why is Dave's baby dead? Because his wife threw it into the path a Big-rig.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Blonde: what does IDK stand for? Brunette: it stands for I Don't Know Blonde: okay, I get it now

what's worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it~? lots of things.

Ducks smell too dog like animal farms riverside Chinese tofu hat hairy and eat beanie.

Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are white And Pansies hold hands and skip

How do you kill a jew? Same way you would anyone

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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