Roses are blue Violets are too I've got Alzheimer Roses are red

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Why didn't the ghost go to the dance? He didn't exist.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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What does "Fiat" stand for? "Fabbrica Italiana Automobili Torino."

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How do you get a dog and a baby mixed up? You stir your chili.

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There is a high speed pursuit when suddenly the suspect's car skids out of control and crashes into a field. Two cows witness the commotion, when one turns round to the other and says "Moo"

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Knock Knock Whos there? It was the unexpected arrival of his wifes lover who'd been having an affair with her for over a year She thought her husband would be out and forgot to tell him not to come The husband started breaking down in tears whilst throwing insults at both of them, grabbing the man by his collar and throwing him on the ground he started to kick his head in The man died and the husband and wife divorced, theres now a bench in the mans local park dedicated to him.

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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What do you call a good anti-joke? something you feel like you should go to hell for laughing at.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Shark bait.

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Why didn't the boy answer the phone when it was ringing? Because he had no arms to pick it up.

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Matt Gregory Harrington is a bender, pylon, hoser, duster tripod, and puck bunny!!!!

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What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

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What is the difference between a black person and an elevator? Well, there are many differences such as the fact that an elevator has a series of wiring and mechanics, while a black man, and white men alike, are human beings.

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Your mum's so fat that she's incredibly lucky she has a loving and supportive husband who values her personality over her appearance.

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what does the black man say to the white man? nice weather were having huh.

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why didn't the mexiczn eat the black man's cooking? because it wasn't good

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Q: What do you get when a black man dates a white lady? A: A perfectly acceptable relationship.

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"I see," said the deaf man, to the blind man, who had no ears.

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Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

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What did the woman say when she didn't finish her meal? Can I get a to go box

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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What do you call an Ethiopian with a yeast infection? Quarter pounder with cheese.

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what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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