How do you make the queen of england cry? You rape her violently.

Do not lose hope, you have always considered me hard to get, while this time, I came to you. Next time too, I kinda owe you.

Why did the man launch his rocket into the sun? He didn't. Overcoming the sun's orbital pull would require your rocket to travel ~7,400,000 mph, which is a velocity that is impossible for today's rockets to reach.

Why did the Asian ace the test? Because she had worked very diligently, taken copious notses, and studied fervently until she had a thorough mastery of the topic.

Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

What do lawyers and sharks have in common? They both play vital roles in their own society or ecosystem.

What do u call a six year old boy holding a gun. illegal

How do you know when you are really ugly? Objective self-evaluation, and frank, honest discussion with close friends and family.

Q: What did the Lone Ranger say when he saw his horse coming? A: Here comes my horse.

What's brown and white all over? Chad butthole

what looks like a sock and goes on peoples feet? A sock

Why did it take the rabbit so long to enter the rabbithole? Because he was hit by a truck and lost a lot of blood.

why is caleb mears sucha perv? becasuee its calebbbb ahahahahahahah

What do a blonde and a door knob have in common? Everybody gets a turn

poop

Why did the Chinese man fall down the stairs? He was shot in the face.

What did steve do when jane asked him for a pencil? He gave her one.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Jeffery Dahmer. Oh, good, you're finally here!

Person A - you must be tired, cuz you've been running though my mind all day Person B - i have no legs...

what did the white rapper say to the black rapper? i like your work. to which the which the black rapper replied, thanks.

What did the T-REX say to the Yettie? This is a highly improbable situation, therefore there is no need for an answer.

What is a Mexicans favorite sport? Tennis.

if life hands u melons, make melonade.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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