Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to commit suicide

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Why did the blond get fired from her job at the M&M factory? Because she threw out all the M&M's with W's on them.

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What do you call a three-legged cheetah? Crippled.

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What did the black man do when he found a bucket full of KFC chicken on the ground? He promptly looked around for anyone who might have bought it. After searching around, with no takers, he ate some of the chicken and saved the rest. He brought it back to his apartment and left it in his fridge, so he may later eat it as leftovers.

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whats small and looks funny? A baby with a penis sewed to its face.

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

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A man accidentally chops his thumb off while preparing his dinner for the night. He immediately calls an ambulance and has his thumb preserved which is later reattached back onto his hand. He then continues his dream career as a solo pianist.

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What did the pedophile say to the delightfully curly-headed youth? Can I have fries with that?

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What did the Hungarian say before he went to bed? "I'm going to bed," but he said it in Hungarian.

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Wanna hear a joke? Too bad.

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Camon is to Jerry Sandusky as Cole Ryder is to Will Higgins!

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Hey, have you heard the one about the elf and the watermelon? Neither have I.

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Why was the little boys mom watching tv in the living room? Better question why is she out of the kitchen.

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what does idk mean? i dont know!! nobody knows!!

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The blond detective was searching a crime scene and replied to the police officer, "I smell something fishy about this situation." She was on her period as a matter of fact, and bled all over her trousers.

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A man walks into a bar. He then says "ow".

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some dude: weed is bad Other dude: then why do they prescribe it to people are you dumb or are you stupid

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Why are Black Guys Black? Migration and adaptation to the harsh heat of the southern Sahara Desert. DUH.

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womans having rights.

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Why didnt sally throw out her lunch? Her mom had a miscarriage, she was never born.

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How can you tell if your blind date is going to be good looking? Go on the date and see if they're good looking.

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Equal rights!

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Why did Santa get stuck up a chimney? Because there was a family of possums living up there. They ripped his face off.

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Q: Why did the mugger kill the bus driver? A: Because he had a gun.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops