A man and his wife are disagreeing about what type of car to get. The wife continously nags him about getting her something that will go from 0-200 in 4 seconds, so he gets her a scale and buys himself a truck, 1 min later an abulance is called because the wife hit the husband with his new car.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Many of people would like to know this question. We have not invented a mind reading device and chickens can't communicate with humans. So no one knows

There were two mufins in an oven. They did not say anything because muffins are incapable of speech.

Your mama so stupid She has a 3rd grade education

There was 2 friends named Shutup and Trouble. They were camping and Trouble got lost in the woods. Shutup called the police. Shutup: Hello, is this 9-1-1 my friend is missing. Police: What is your name sir? Shutup: Shut up Police: What? Shutup: Shut up Police: What did you say? Shutup: I said Shut Up Police: Hey are you looking for TROUBLE? Shutup: Yes! Police: Guess what? We found him, he's safe in the station. We will have a officer come by a drop him off. Have a good day Mr. Shutup Shutup: Thank you

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

Roses are red, Violets are green, get in my bed, if you know what I mean.

Jesse is so fat that Roy is jealous of his big ass tits

Knock knock! Who's there? The doorbell wasn't working.

Knock knock Who's there Orange Orange who Orange

What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

roak

why didnt the girl laugh at the joke? because it wasnt funny

My girlfriend told me "Give me twelve inches and make it hurt" I ejaculated prematurely and fell asleep.

Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

Why was the ginger crying? Because they used him as the fire hydrant.

Roses are red Violets are red I'm bleeding quite profusely I should proably go to the hospital

Why did the woman go to the kitchen? The same reason she went to the bathroom, she needed to wash her hands because she was finger painting. Her husband was using the bathroom.

Republicans

How do you get rid of black elephants? Arrest it for being black.

Why are Black Guys Black? Migration and adaptation to the harsh heat of the southern Sahara Desert. DUH.

So what have you overcome? I mean I know alot about you, but little about your personal deeper self, with that said, you telling me you are some kind of X-men when it comes to genetics?

Knock Knock Who's there? The KKK, got any blacks?

What happened to the gun that was jammed? It didn't shoot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...